What.... | Ch. 4 Part 2

Ch.4 Part. 2 Dear Diary

Once I got home I was beaming. It was an amazing date, I will never forget. Austin was perfect; we were going to the happiest couple in the world! At least that is what I thought.......

I walked into the kitchen to grab an apple & water before going up to my bed. There she was....asleep, quiet, lonely, & depressed Gianna. Gianna is my older sister, she had just gotten out of a relationship that she believed would last forever. {He broke up with her over some stupid fight about bananas.} It made no sense to me, at all. She was still wallowing in self pity. My family decided it was good for her to have this "down time", we called it.

Usually she ould make it to the couch before passing out but, not his time. She was there, lying on the kitchen floor, covered in chips & cheeze-its. I began to wonder if Austin & I might, one day, break up. I knew we always said "forever & always" but, you never know...

"Gianna! Get up, it is 9 o'clock, you have to get up & go to your room! Cierra will be up soon! GET UP!!!"

"What! Did Jake call?!! OMG! Hello, why didn't you wake me up, sooner!!" She grabbed the phone and yelled into it, as if Jake was on the other end, "Hello, Jake?!"

"No body called, you need to get up! Cierra will be up soon!! GO!"

"Oh right, Sorry!!" She yelled as she ran up the kitchen stairs to her room.

Cierrais our little sister, she is 12 ans very young-minded for her age. She should know all about her body & emotional changes by now. We keep her on a tight lock down, as you can tell: Private school, no sleepovers, & no boys! We always told her that Gianna was sick and had the flu. That she couldn't see her during this time.

I thought it was useless because, she always went to me or our other sister, Kasey B. She just felt more comfortable talking to Kasey B. & I about why certain girls wear such revealing clothes around school.  Kasey B. & I never really asked Gianna about anything. It was always mom we would run to.

Once i got up to my room, in stormed my mom, worried about me like I was kidnapped or murdered. She looked at me like a new born child.

"Hailey, are you okay? How was the date? Why are you so smiley!?" she said frantically.

"I am fine, the date was amazing & I had a lot of fun" I paused and looked up as I was unpacking my bag. Mom looked at me as if she knew I was hiding something from her, "Well, you promise you wont flip out or go crazy over this little piece of happiness for me?"

She sat like a dog ready for its treat. "Yes! Tell me sweet heart, what happened?"

"Well, the night was beautiful & the beach was magnificent. I love the movie we went to see, a good comedy....." I proceeded to tell my mom about the WHOLE night, in great detail.

"um....wow, darling are you okay? Was he nice? Not forceful?"

"Yes, mom he was great & such a sweet guy. I am fine. You're not mad?"

"Um... I need time to process this. Okay, honey?"

"Yeah sure..."

After she left the room, I sat there in the room worried & anixous. I was never sure if my mom would tell my dad or all her "closest" friends about it. I was always left with a weird saying like, I need time to process this.... It just drove me nuts thinking about what was going to happen next. Who was going to randomly text me & ask me exactly what happened & with who.

Twenty minutes later, what felt like two hours, my mom came back into tell me what she was going "to do about it". Like it was some big deathly thing, that I may die if not treated soon.

"Honey, I want you to go to see a therapist. She is really good & I want you to get tested & did you use protection?"

"Yes, mom i did. But, I don't understand why you are saying I should go to a therapist."

"I know you don't understand right now but, I want you to be safe & have a person to talk to. I know you love talking to me & Kasey B. about your personal things but, I think you need to see a professional. Also, before you go I want you to start a diary."

"This is so weird, mom. You just are concered about the little things & I am okay. Nothing bad happened. Austin is an amazing guy & I love him. I wanted this. I will start a diary but, I am not set on the therapist, yet."

"I know sweety but, I want you to do this for a while. Until, you get back on track.", like i had gotten off track. I had sex, I didn't do drugs or get into a fight at school.
", I know you don't understand my reasoning and I get that but, I want you to try it my way before you go on with your life. You need to figure out what this means & how you really feel about it. Listen, I have to go & take Abby to her play date & then I have a meeting with Ceirra's Gymnastics teacher. While, I ma gone I want you to start your diary. Okay? I love you!"

"Love you too, bye."

I sat there in disbelief. Of everything. I was concerned my mother had lost it & I knew she was not giving up on this therapist thing. So the only way to possibly get it out of her mind was to start this Diary thing......yippy....

Dear Diary,

I have no idea why i am writing this. I had sex & my mother is very certain that I have some kind of a problem. I guess this may be helpful in getting some of those bad days out of my mind. I know how I feel about some days & I think it would be good to write it out & express how I feel besides blurting it all out to my boy friend in History.

I guess I am here for the long/short hall. I will write again soon, maybe...

love? hugs? bye?
Hailey Joyson

My diary life began.......